I’ve been stuck in bed for the last four days with flu and on the fourth day, I had been feeling well enough to get my ass out of bed and scrounge around the fridge for food like a homeless squirrel that didn’t get the hibernation memo. Food was the greatest adventure I’ve had in the last week let alone any sex.

During this appalling approach to address my appetite, I missed a call from my mum. I don’t think I ever could have prepared myself for the conversation that followed…

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This has got to be the most amazing FAKE Magazine Cover out there. Especially for woman! Well… Only for woman? No, I think this speaks to the guys as well. All those magazines that your girlfriend, wife or Spontaneous-Late-Night-Booty-Call chick read are absolutely brainwashing theses ladies. Honestly, if there ever were a magazine this brutally honest about “How-To-Please-Your-Man” it would sell like wild fire. Sex Tips from a magazine columnist who tells you how to spice up your bedroom, kitchen, washing machine and tumble dryer sex by adding in that Egg-Beater is like taking sex advice from your 95-year-old Nan, Gladys O’Riley . I mean the most wild night she ever had was kissing a complete stranger in a bomb shelter who miraculously impregnated her and felt obliged to then marry her. That was one HOT night  back in the days of The Irish Civil War in 1922.

Not much to say about this one for the gents but the yellow text on the right side says it all.